Saturday, April 30, 2011

Weird Neighbors

Well yesterday, the dog whisperer (no, not ceasar...i tried to contact him, he ignores me. LOL) came over and we signed all paperwork and set up classes and private lessons. He proceeded to tell us how he was telling his coworker about our dogs and how crazy they are and how badly we need this. THANK YOU! How nice of you to tell all your coworkers how messed up my dogs are. I really appreciate it (he's so right though). lol and when he came in the house today, our German Shepherd almost ate him. Pretty sure that's not a good way to start off a relationship...

Bentley (german shepherd) got smart today and figured out how to open the front door. And we have a screen door as well, and I guess he caught a glimpse of something and decided he needed to check out the situation RIGHT AWAY. So, all I hear is a huge bang and my screen door flies open...Bentley jumped on the door, and unlatched it. Husband goes and looks outside and doesn't see Bentley. So he comes back and says "is he inside?" UMM ! LOOK A LITTLE HARDER HUNNIE! DO YOU NOT SEE WHAT I SEE?  IT'S A BIG FREAKIN' DOG PRANCING THROUGH THE NEIGHBORS YARD CHASING BIRDS!!!!! Husband goes, OH and calls him back over...and he runs back with his ears down, like he knew he was wrong, but just couldn't resist the chance to make 'friends' with the birds. Last time Bentley wanted to make friends with mother nature, I found him and the other dogs eating birds out of the trees. And a few weeks before that they were chasing a huge frog around in the backyard....disgusting dogs.


So, since baby is sleeping and hubby is helping his mom cut a tree today, I'm sitting here bored out of my mind. Until I look out the window and realized what seriously weird neighbors I have. Here's the scoop:

The jackass next door who owns the restaurant is driving his little white corvette around in circles in his parking lot blaring techno music. Now, for a visual,  is 300lbs and 50 yrs old. Who is he trying to impress in his little white corvette? News flash, no one likes you. Everyone thinks your a dbag. I'm guessing either he's trying to be an ass, or his stomach is so huge that the steering wheel got stuck under his belly rolls and it making him go in circles. Either way, i hate him. :)

Next up, we have a single mom (who is really nice) and her mother.  Her terror of a child is currently running around the yard with sharp sticks. Now, he has his head in a huge flower pot. Anytime my dogs bark, he screams "SHUT UP OVER THERE!!!!!!!!!" and then anytime hubby walks out the front door, the little kid screams at the top of his lungs LOL. His mom and grandma always leave him to play outside alone. They never watch him. They just let him out like he's a little cat, hoping that he comes back at the end of the night....

Next to them, is the man I lovingly refer to as "Mr. Alien". One day, I look out the window, and he's lining up little black boxes all in his yard and staring up into space. Now, he could very well be doing something involving solar panels or whatever....but it's so much more fun to think he's an alien, trying to 'phone home'. (speaking of, he just pulled in now...he ran inside...aliens don't like sunlight, but that's just what I hear).

Next to Mr. Alien, we have "Body Turner". I think he's got some crazy secret like he's a murder (he's not, lol but I like to let my imagination run wild). He never speaks to me. I wave to him all the time and he ignores me. Maybe his exwife was a tall friendly brunette and now he holds a serious hate for all of us...who knows. But we always see young women over there and then never see them again (well, I see them doing the walk of shame to their car the next morning, but again, its so much more fun to pretend).  When people come to his door, he never answers. One day, there was a lady at his door, but he wasn't home, and then he pulled down our street, saw she was there, and turned his car around and didn't come back until she was gone!

Down the street, we have a little chinese boy who is cute as can be, but he's freaky. He rides down the street talking to himself and one day, hubby and I were playing catch and he rode by us and did an evil laugh...he's possessed. ;)

Next up!! We call her Limper. I won't go into details about her or her crew...I'm too afraid I'll get beat down....

and finally, it brings us to the oddballs of the street...(cue the Twilight Zone music).  They have two weird looking faces attached to their garage door handles. They are actually like ceramic faces of like Amish people, but they have black eyes...its weird. and they have an extremely squeaky windmill and when we have the windows open at night, it keeps us awake. So husband and i are going to pull a night mission one of these times. Called "midnight oil mission". Were going to oil the blades on that dumb thing so we can sleep. They have all the random things you would find at the dollar store, all over their yard. And they recently 'classed' their yard up with 2 ft plastic columns on their porch steps.

Well, what is really funny is, all of these people are I'm sure normal...I'm the freakin' creep who knows this much about her neighbors. Clearly, I'm the one with the mental issues...lol.

I need to find something to do...creeping on my weird neighbors is not a great way to pass time....

Friday, April 29, 2011

The new "KICK ME" sign...

Well, I'm sure some of you remember when my husband decided it would be funny to paint my face and hands BLUE in my sleep....(if not, let me refresh your memory)....it was SO HARD to get that paint off when it dried...


So now, payback is a 'you know what'.....i puffy painted his boxers. but only on the back. When he gets up in the morning, he doesn't check to see what he is putting on...He keeps the light off when he's getting changed because baby is sleeping in our room....so I took it upon myself to get him back. It's the new KICK ME sign on the back...only its IM A SILLY BOY! MY WIFE OWNS ME sign on his badonkadonk ;) hahahha


I'm just waiting for that moment when I see "I'm A Silly Boy. I'm A Silly Boy" peek out of the top of his jeans...and I'm hoping it's somewhere out in public like Home Depot! Where he can be all manly and stuff, and then when he bends down to get something...out comes the puffy paint...

Ohhhh now the challenge is not to laugh every time he gets dressed in the morning!

Royal Wedding, Pee & Beheading.

So I wake up and I'm bummed because baby woke up an hour earlier then he normally does...and I know it's only an hour so I should suck it up BUT I barely slept! My dog was jumping at our door because he was scared and I was thinking about the Royal Wedding. LOL

I go to change baby and I'm making big faces at him to keep him entertained, and I pull open the diaper and BOOM! PEE! RIGHT IN THE FACE! He is mid stream and happy as can be. And, the genius idea would be to move the diaper BACK up so that he can finish peeing in his diaper...but that would be the logical thing to do. I was still half asleep...(or half awake, depends on if your glass is half full or empty today haha). So I just let it hit me in the face. Who does that?!

Well, I figured that I was awake already, I might as well sit with baby and watch the Royal Wedding and the 'countdown to this kiss' say 8:24. and I'm like HOLY CRAP. EIGHT HOURS? I thought the wedding was at 11am!!! And then I realize that it meant 8 minutes. And then I thought, what does countdown to the kiss mean anyway...? I thought you werent allowed to kiss before the ceremony....so now my mind is going crazy...

I look down on my phone (yes I found it finally) and my hubby was writing about how he watched it and everything. GREAT. so yes the ceremony was at 11am....IN LONDON! NOT OHIO. Like, really? I couldn't have put two and two together and figured that out maybe earlier? Maybe last night? NOPE! And here's the kicker. Baby is always up at 9 so I thought to myself, I'll have more then enough time to watch it, so no need to DVR it.



FAIL!!!!!!!

But I did get to see the kiss. I just love Kate. But if that was me, just to shake it up a bit, I would have grabbed my hubby and made out with him. Just for the shock factor. Which I'm pretty sure is why, I'm not part of the royal family and she is.

I couldn't help but picture myself in her shoes. What it would be like to be her at that moment. I couldn't contain myself like she did. I just don't have that sort of self control! I would be so excited and waving to everyone like a crazy person!! lol another reason, why I wouldn't ever find myself in a Royal Family....

BUT my great aunt did some research and I'm related to KING HENRY the EIGHTH....now granted, he was the one who cut off all his wives heads...but that's besides the point. Those are just minor details...I'm still in a royal family...so I, will celebrate!! BECAUSE IM ROYAL! ;)

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Guilty Pleasure?

Is it bad that I get pleasure out of hearing my husband struggle to keep order in the house?

When he comes home from work, I go take a shower and I just sit in there hysterically laughing because all I hear is baby screams, dogs barking, hubby talking baby and trying to talk dog LOL

When he talks baby talk to our son, baby stops crying, but dogs start to play fight for his attention...so when he goes over to the dogs to break it up and settle them down, baby starts to cry....

and its just an ongoing thing. I can't help but just love it because it makes me feel so much better that I can handle it throughout the day.

I asked him to go through our coupons while I was in the shower and see if he wanted anything out of them, and his exact words, "HUN, I HAVE THE BABY! I CAN'T DO ANYTHING!" and i laughed because if I used that excuse, nothing would get done around the house...no laundry, dishes, vacuuming, nothing.

Makes me feel good and empowered...and if that is the only way to feel that way, is to listen to my hubby struggle to keep order in the house....then so be it...

MORE POWER TO ME :)

Easter Bunny, Phantom Noises & Crystal Lady

So to be honest, I forget what happened on Friday and Saturday....? OH (had to go back in my facebook and relive my days) Friday night, lightning struck the big tree in our backyard...it was such a bad storm and I was video taping the rain outside and we could hear the thunder roll in and so we turned off all our lights in the house and watched the show in the sky. Well, my husband was walking up the stairs from the basement and all of a sudden, BOOM, lightning strikes our tree and it completely explodes at the top. I was videotaping, but not the right angle LOL (typical) and completely missed it, but I got the sound of it. It was pretty cool! But we spent an hour in the basement with the dogs and baby. Luckily I moved my glider downstairs (i said i would never use it....hmmm i was wrong) so baby and i sat in the glider and he slept through the whole thing! thank goodness!

Saturday, we went over to my parents house and I was able to take a lot of great pictures of my parents with the baby. It doesn't happen often, so I was really thankful to get the shots that I did. Their house and land is so beautiful and it photographs so well! and I couldn't have asked for a better day to shoot.

We spent Easter morning with my family and then went to the in-laws for a late dinner. I took a bunch of great pictures too! :)

What I realized as I woke up on Easter morning, was that Easter morning last year, was the time I started to feel that morning sickness. When I think about it now, I get sick to my stomach.  I remember I woke up my hubby with McDonalds breakfast and made him hop around the yard (not lying) with a green easter bag and find all the easter eggs i hid...and it was the front yard. What's even better, is that I have video of him clearly hopping through the yard. it's hilarious. Clearly I was finding my inner soon to be mother instincts :)

So the beginning of the week after Sunday was typical as usual....boring days. LONG DAYS. Stressful days. I've had an extremely fussy baby, who is just all about crying and screaming. he wont sleep in his crib anymore. So on top of a fussy baby, my dog is completely going bonkers. We have a baby gate in the kitchen and Kodi will jump it. So we put another baby gate ON TOP OF the other one...so when Kodi hears these 'phantom noises' that hes so scared of...he flips and tries to jump both gates. Well, then he decided to try to jump out the window since he can't get out the baby gate way. Since jumping out the window won't work...he decided to try something else. I hear dishes rattling, so I go into the kitchen, and there is Kodi, in the kitchen sink....so I get mad and start to lose my cool a little bit. I get him out of the sink and put the baby gate BACKup...which he decided to give another try to jumping it...which he succeeded...

So I call the Dog Whisperer in our neck of the woods. I've had it. He comes over and gives me hope. He brought his dog and showed us how well trained his dog is...HIS DOG SAT ON TOP OF THE FIRE HYDRANT....NOT LYING! and while I know, none of my dogs will be doing this great trick...he gave me hope that he could help all three of our dogs. So I feel great....I just have to figure out where to come up with the 2,000 bucks to do it...Dog Whisperers don't come cheap I guess....

So today, we were supposed to go to baby's physical therapy session...but of course, as always the therapist cancels. We take baby to physical therapy because I noticed his left arm is weaker then his right arm. so we go every week to get it stronger...and he gets baby massages and everything. BUT THIS THERAPIST IS A NUT! not kidding either. So, every time we get there, she puts my husband to work. "um, can you go get this for me....' 'hey, can you wipe that up for me...' 'go grab that and put it away'. LOL so before I was like "UM WHY DONT YOU GET YOUR STUFF TOGETHER BEFORE YOU HAVE US COME IN" and now I think it's hilarious to watch my husband run around and do this crazy lady's job.

So the other day, my son was screaming and not happy...she decides to pull out of her pocket, a crystal....she then states that its always handy to keep a crystal in your pocket. So now I am just confused on what is happening...and she is waving the crystal in front of my son and waving her other hand behind him. Like were witches or something. I look at my husband and mom (mom came because she didn't believe that the lady was as crazy as i told her) and they both start silently laughing...she then asks me to come over and get involved...and she puts her hands on me and goes "oh wow, mom, your tense...i can feel your energy..." and im like "IM TENSE CUZ YOURE TOUCHING ME!" and she didn't get the hint to GET HER HANDS OFF ME! so then she invites my mom over who of course gets all into it and therapist says to my mom "okay, feel this...just FEEL it...get into it"...so my mom puts her head down and starts to get in the zone...now i feel crazy. really crazy...

after that weird situation...she pulls out the balance ball and states, "i love balls, everyone loves balls. big balls, small balls. they all are great...." i pretty much lost it...couldn't take it anymore....

so to say the least...my weeks are interesting...I have a crazy crystal lady, who we are paying thousands to perform weird motions around my sons back and tell us how much she loves balls. I have my dog in my sink, and the least that dog can do is wash my damn dishes while he's in there....

and i have a baby in my lap screaming and cant stop laughing because i  think its hilarious when i bounce my leg up and down and his screaming gets broken up to the bounces :)

Friday, April 22, 2011

How does Jesus have a twitter before me?

I'll just start off by saying that everytime Friday rolls around, that terrible song with that young girl gets stuck in my head...."friday friday fridayyy". drives me up the wall.

ANYWAY. Today started off with a bang. I fell asleep with baby's bib in my bed and it got stuck to my pants. And typically, it is my husband who gets the bib stuck to his pants. He tends to sit on the couch and the velcro of the bib attaches to his pants and he will walk around with it hanging there for hours. I have even let him go to the store with it. It's hilarious. Well, it came back to bite me in the you know what. I didn't realize it was on my pants until after I finished going to the bathroom and when i stood up, there was a bib, soaked. Epic Fail. :)

I'm starting to get into this whole Twitter thing. I still don't understand it though. It's not like facebook news feed so I'm clearly having issues adapting. But what is really getting me, is that Jesus has a twitter account. I didn't realize Jesus knew how to Twitter. Clearly, I under estimated his 'hip-ness'. Props to Jesus :) But I feel like a stalker....praying obviously isn't enough for me? Now I have to follow Him on Twitter? ;)

This weekend, we will be celebrating Easter with our families. Tomorrow, we will be going to my parents house to dye some Easter eggs. They just got a new little sports car so my hubby is dying to go over there and detail it. He's weird.

Sunday will be a day full of family. We are going to my parents house and celebrating with my grandma, uncle, and cousins. I don't have a huge family so it's nothing too crazy. Then we will be going to spend time with my in-laws. I always look forward to that. :) Should be a great weekend, full of family (as always). Wishing my brother and sister in law would get to come up for Easter, but they are busy. So were looking forward to seeing them one weekend soon.

Shout-out to Lindsay. I always have a shout-out for a soulmate :)

And a big thank you to Amanda!! You've been such a great help with this blog and everything. You're the best!

Happy Weekend everyone!!! Go find me on Twitter @EllieLaur

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Launch Party!!!

Welcome!!!

Finally the launch of my blog, The 3D's in Life. If you're interested in the name, just click on the About 3D's tab. It will give you a full idea on what were all about here.

Keep an eye out for blogs that are titled CAPTION THIS! It will be a contest for the best caption for a given photo. You have a chance to win some gift cards!!!

Take a look around, see what you find. Lot's of ads that are great so go exploring through those that are on my page.

Don't forget to check out the Photo of the Week tab as well. I'm hoping to post some really embarrassing pictures of my husband :) But I'll spare him this week and just promote my Scentsy!